33 Gentle Goals To Set For A Calm Year

Somewhere along the way, goal setting stopped being fun and started feeling overwhelming. There is this pressure that comes with setting goals nowadays. Everyone is trying to do it all. Do more, be better, fix everything… It’s not very realistic. Not to mention, it’s exhausting. What if this year you didn’t cave to hustle culture? What if you set goals that were gentle, calm, and allowed you to live a softer life? Gentle goals aren’t about lowering your standards or giving up. It’s a way to slow down and smell the roses. Gentle goals allow you to still make progress in life without burning yourself out. This year, you can move slowly. You can set goals that make you feel more like yourself.

If this sounds like something you’re craving, gentle goals are the perfect place to start. 

What are gentle goals?

You might be interested in the ideas mentioned above, but what are gentle goals exactly? Gentle goals are the perfect mix of tangible and intentional. They are goals rooted in how you want to feel, not just what you want to achieve. 

Gentle goals can be more flexible. They can be seasonal. The hope is that these goals will build consistency in your life and allow you to live a happier, calmer lifestyle. 

Gentle goals are meant to be lower stress. No need to chase rigid deadlines. That is why gentle goals can resemble intentions sometimes more than say, SMART goals. 

A gentle goal may sound like:

• “Create a slow morning routine” instead of “wake up at 5am every day”
• “Move my body in fun ways” instead of “work out 5 days a week”
• “Journal without any expectations” instead of “journal daily”

Gentle goals acknowledge that progress doesn’t need to be loud to be meaningful. Sometimes the smallest changes make the biggest difference. 

How to choose the right gentle goals for you 

Choosing gentle goals starts with listening. Listening to who, you might ask? Yourself!

The gentle goals you set will depend on what is currently going on with you and what you want to happen. These goals should give you a sense of relief when you think about them. Not just feel like another to-do item on your list. 

Begin by asking yourself some questions:

• How do you want this season of your life to feel?
• What area of life needs more calm?
• What would support you instead of push you?
• What feels realistic with your current energy levels?
• What is important to you but also overwhelming you?

Once you answer these questions, you should feel closer to choosing your gentle goals. 

33 gentle goals to set this year 

Let’s jump into some gentle goals you can set for a super calm and relaxing year ahead while still feeling like you are moving forward and making progress! The best of both worlds!

Create a slow morning routine you actually enjoy

Figure out what the perfect morning looks like to you. Is it staying in your pjs and making a yummy breakfast? Or maybe reading a book with your morning coffee. Decide what a slow morning means to you and then start doing that!

Go to bed 30 minutes earlier most nights 

Something that will make a big difference in your nervous system (and therefore, how calm you feel) is sleep! Make a sleeping goal by going to bed earlier. Maybe that looks like physically being in bed earlier but not sleeping. Or it could be lights out earlier. Whatever works for you.

Do one thing at a time instead of multitasking

Humans really are not great at multitasking. It’s generally stressful, and most of the time you don’t end up getting more done anyway! So stop doing it. Focus on solo tasking. Make the effort to slow down and complete one singular task at a time.

➡ A cozy little note on doing one thing at a time

Go for a walk daily (short or long, doesn’t matter)

Don’t make this into a super rigid workout goal. Just get moving once a day. You could go for a hike, a stroll around the neighbourhood, a quick walk on your treadmill or walking pad, or even just a 10 minute walk break at work. It all counts!

Build in “pause moments” into your day

Do you ever sit down at the end of your day and feel completely strung out? You can’t think, your nervous system is out of whack, and you realize you’ve barely taken a bathroom break… that feeling sucks! If you set this gentle goal, try setting an alarm once or twice a day to just pause. Take a break from the computer, get some fresh air, eat something. If you can, schedule it into your day like you would anything else.

Make empty space in your schedule on a regular basis 

I love this one! People are always filling every empty space in their days. Always picking up their phones when waiting for an appointment or saying yes to every event or outing. Start scheduling empty space. Do nothing. Maybe you can do this once a week or more, or less. Whatever you can do. This could be time to unwind on your patio with a drink, time to have a bath, time to just stare into the void… who cares! Just do nothing for a bit.

Practice talking to yourself more kindly 

Use gentle words and phrases. Hang up kind words around the house as a reminder. Take a step back when you start saying those mean things to yourself and replace them with nicer things.

Journal without rules or expectations 

If you set this gentle goal, try getting yourself a physical journal and a cute pen or pencil, and just do whatever comes to mind. Draw a picture, write a story, write a diary entry, list 3 things that went well that day, put down one word that explains how you feel… just do something. It doesn’t need to be structured or pretty.

Reduce comparison (especially online)

Make it your goal to stop comparing yourself to others. It will bring you great happiness in the long term! Take social media breaks, distance yourself from unhealthy people, and focus more on yourself this year.

Let go of all-or-nothing thinking 

Try to stop the black and white thinking. Do things “half assed” and be okay with it.

➡ I wrote a whole blog post about all-or-nothing thinking. Give it a read!

Create cozy spots in your home 

A gentle and cozy home will make for a gentle and cozy life! Add calm colors, soft textures, and other home décor items that make you feel cozy.

Slowly declutter your space (one room or spot at a time)

You don’t need to completely declutter and deep clean your house in one go, or even every Sunday. Set a goal of tackling one room at a time. Don’t rush yourself. Do it when it feels right.

Create for joy

All those hobbies you loved as a kid? Do them again! Create things just for joy. You don’t need to make money from every hobby you do. You don’t need to be good at everything. Just create for the fun of it. Pick up a paintbrush and create something. Finish a puzzle and then put it back in the box. Find joy again!

Spend more time with people who make you feel good

It feels good to be around positive and healthy people. Make more time in your schedule for those people. The people who lift you up and make you feel full when you leave. Take note of the people who drain you and spend less time with them this year.

Communicate your needs more clearly 

If you tend to be a people pleaser (same), this is for you! Work on telling people how you feel and what you need. If something is bothering you, tell people. If you feel unloved or lonely, reach out. Communicate what you need with your loved ones!

I truly believe this is a skill that needs practice. The more you do this, the easier it will become.

Make an effort to reconnect with people on a monthly basis

I love seeing people host dinner parties and get-togethers on a monthly basis. You know, the ones with themes like “Galentines Day” or “Friendsgiving.” Find something that works for you and then do it monthly. That could be a coffee date, a virtual movie night, or just a phone call. Create a community around you!

Be fully present during conversations 

Put your phone away when you’re with people! Listen to be part of the conversation, not to just respond. Again, this is a skill that is learned. Slow down and be in the moment when you are with someone. Ask questions, make other people feel heard, and be a good friend.

Move your body in fun ways 

Everyone always has an exercise goal, which is not a bad thing! However, to make that usual goal more gentle, let’s just focus on moving in a fun way. Do you like swimming? Go to the pool more often! Do you like dancing? Join a dance class. Think outside the box and make moving your body something you truly enjoy.

Eat to feel nourished

This will be different for everyone. Eating to feel nourished could be eating healthy foods and meeting nutrition standards. It could also be eating until you feel full (and maybe even doing back for seconds). Or maybe it looks like having your favourite comfort food on a chilly day. Listen to your body this year!

Find new foods that you like 

Try new recipes, order something new off the menu, or grab something you’ve never had before from the grocery store. I like doing this with fruit at the grocery store. There is always something interesting to try! No strict schedule of making something new every week or having to cook a whole recipe. Just find something new you enjoy.

Learn without worrying about mastering 

Have you ever wanted to learn more about dinosaurs? Website building? Watercolour painting? How rocketships work? Set a gentle goal of learning something new. Not to master it, but just to gather more information and know a little more than you did before.

Allow yourself to change your mind 

Something that will bring you a lot of peace and calm this year is letting yourself change your mind. Whether because you were wrong or you tried something and didn’t like it or any other reason. Don’t hold on to opinions for your ego.

Try something new just because 

This is the year of not needing a reason! You don’t need to be asked on a date to try the new fancy restaurant in town. There doesn’t need to be an event to make homemade cards for your family. Just do things and try new things because you can.

Celebrate your small wins 

Make life fun and celebrate all the things! I bet you’ll have so many small wins to celebrate when you set your gentle goals for the year.

➡ Here are some ideas of how to celebrate your wins!

Honor your natural energy cycles

Gentle living and calmness go hand in hand with rest. Honor your energy cycles and rest when you need to. Get away from the hustle and bustle lifestyle and productivity mindsets.

Spend more time screen-free 

Technology is not good for us! All the screen time and endless scrolling. If you choose this gentle goal, start your day screen-free. End your day screen-free. Find other things to do that are not on a screen.

Get out in the fresh air more often 

Go for walks, step outside your house for a few minutes and breathe in the air, go bird watching, sit outside the café, and so on. Make an effort to do more things outside if you can.

Practice pausing before reacting 

A hard one! So often, we react before really thinking about what we are doing or saying. Remember that you are not in control of everything around you, but you ARE in control of how you react. Start thinking about that more often and practice taking a short pause before you do or say things. I think this will bring you a lot of happiness over time and create a much calmer life.

Allow yourself to make mistakes 

As Hannah Montana says, everybody makes mistakes! This year is the year you try and fail and then try again. It’s okay to mess up. Mistakes are just learning opportunities.

Measure your progress by consistency 

Whatever goals you end up setting this year, measure your progress by consistency. Did you work on your goal often? Did you try? Progress was made then. It’s not always achieved or not achieved. Life is not black and white like that. The gentle way to goal setting is realizing that you make progress every time you show up.

Help someone without any expectations 

Do some good deeds! Help without needing anything in return.

Do things messy instead of waiting for the perfect time 

There is never a perfect time for anything in life. Make it a habit to do things messy. You won’t always have the completed plan and that’s okay. Just get started!

Give everything you have “a home” in your house 

The ultimate way to keep your brain clutter-free. When your space is cluttered, so is your mind. Make it a goal to find a home for everything. Maybe get a few baskets for around the house or those drawer organizers. I promise you can create a space for everything. And maybe the things that don’t have a home don’t need to be in your home. You could do this over time, so it’s not overwhelming!

Final thoughts 

Hopefully, you find some new goals to set this year that will support a softer, more gentle life. The goal here is to create a life that is easy on your nervous system and takes away unnecessary stress. 

Goal achievement doesn’t need to be large and loud. You can set gentle goals that help you change your life for the long term instead of just chasing meaningless goals. 

This is your permission to choose peace over chaos. To slow down and enjoy the simple things in life. 

Which gentle goal will you be adding to your list this year?

Until next time, 

Deanna